Who makes a list with three items on it?
No word on how sexuality factored in, save this snippet which is strangely telling about the author’s own record:
“I have no list. Many years ago, a girlfriend of mine found a notebook in which I’d recorded the details of my own sexual past. I had two lists, one for the women I’d slept with and one for the men with whom I’d had fleeting sexual encounters in high school and college.”
Turns out Schwyzer’s history, particularly with the feminist community, is rather complicated. But that’s neither here nor there.
So, how about it? Do you keep a list? Why? How?
I’ll keep my answer brief: Yes. Because I don’t want to lose track. I separate the third-basers from the homeruns. I also keep a list of horrible first dates, but that is also neither here nor there.
Every time I drunkenly announce my list’s existence to any group of gay men, I invariably encounter two responses: Either there isn’t enough paper in the universe to hold such a record (particularly if you separate “messing around” from “all the way”) or if there was enough paper, there’s no way the list could be recalled, certainly not after several years as a sexually active gay man.
I’m sure I’m not in the majority in this one, but I can’t be the only gay man who’s attempted a list. Guys, help me out here? And Schwyzer suggests this might be more of a lady trend… any lesbians brave enough to admit this one?
For the sanctity of my virgin ears, everyone, please keep it brief.