July 1, 2018 rolled around like any other day, except that it wasn’t. As the distracted-driving crackdown went into effect, the cops were out in full force, waiting for knuckleheads with cell phones in their paws to pass by and get lit up with blue lights.
Some of you readers undoubtedly felt the sting, so I wanted to share a few devices that I tried out to ensure y’all could count on us to save you a buck or two by 1) getting legal and 2) avoiding the cheap trash that calls itself “compliant.” I swear: I’ve purchased so many garbage phone-mounts in my lifetime that’ve melted in the heat, wouldn’t properly suction to my windshield, or just flat-out broke after a week of normal use. “Why does this have to be so hard?” I would ask my wife, showing her yet another busted $10 POS I was throwing in the trash.
I don’t have that issue anymore, so let me pass the secret on: It’s Cellairis, a company that does phone repair fast and with killer guarantees, and also sells top-notch accessories that aren’t made from recycled Solo cups, or whatever it is I’ve stupidly been buying. Chances are, if you’ve been to any concerts at Lakewood, you already know the company, as it’s technically the Cellairis Lakewood Amphitheater.
Right out of the gate, I was stoked. Instead of having to clamp my phone into a holster using two hands — one to hold the grip open and the other to situate my phone — the hands-free devices are all magnetic. Literally, all you do is touch your phone to the device and it’s stuck there until you pull it off. Magic, right? In order for you to achieve that magnetic magic, you simply put the provided, thin, adhesive plate onto the back of your phone (it’s wafer-thin and weightless), and voila! That’s the magnet that’s drawn to the one the holster’s actually made of. And it’s strong!
You can get one for your windshield, which has a suction-cup base that latches like a famished algae eater onto the glass with a reinforced compressor that squeezes all the air out, creating a literally air-tight seal. I’ve intentionally left it on the glass in the straight-up baking sun for days and it’s still there. I figured it might’ve melted off like my other ones, and that may be something I could warn you about. Nope! Still going strong. There’s a matching suction-cup version that’s a little stickier, and attaches to your dashboard — in case having anything on your precious glass is a no-no.
Then there’s one that clamps onto a slat in your air vent, kind of like an air freshener, but one that’ll keep points off your driver’s license. Again, it’s magnetic, so you simply touch your phone to it once you’re in the car and you’re ready to rock. What’s pretty killer about that is that heat will destroy electronics, so if you’re charging it or having a super-long, road-trip conversation on speakerphone, the A/C will keep it nice and cool. There’s also a utilitarian mount you can put anywhere in the car, for those who have a more clandestine approach to where their cellular telephonic communication device is implanted within the cockpit of their transport module, in the case of “Big Brother’s prying eyes.” Or if you just want it somewhere you think is cooler — you do you.
Personally, though? The absolute best is the mount that’s not only magnetic, but wirelessly charges your phone. (Cellairis is living in 3018, y’all.) If your phone is capable of wireless charging, then you’ve got it made, honey.
There are a few Cellairis dealerships around Atlanta, and for those way up north of OTP, hit up the Mall of Georgia. That’s where International Retail Account Executive Melissa Garcia, an out lesbian, got her start and helped me out with tracking down some actual hands-free devices that do not suck. Seriously: I’ll never spend another dime with another company for these types of devices, should I lose one of the two I use for each car.